This is a moment to cherish and a major milestone for the motorman household. The room formally known as bathroom can once again proudly retake its title and place among its fellow rooms. For it is with great pleasure to announce that after 54 days without, there is finally a working toilet, sink and shower. It is especially gratifying to welcome shower into our lives, for this was not replaced it is a new permanent element for our enjoyment.

What I have learned through these last 54 days is enough to fill a series of epic novels with swash-buckling buccaneers, damsels in distress, the high seas, and international intrigue. Okay, maybe it was neither that exciting nor dangerous, but it was a long long time to wait.

For those out there interested in home remodeling with the use of professional help learn from motorman. First, do not (and I know this is pretty common knowledge) hire your friend to do the work. It seems like a good idea, especially if you two do not hang out as much as you used to, but there will never be a typical client-contractor relationship where you can easily crack the whip if needed.

I have a belief that contractors are a rare breed. They are drawn to the profession through the allure of setting their own hours, working for themselves, and playing with power tools. Contractors are also juggling 1000 jobs at once. If you have a familiar relationship with yours it is too easy to overlook the lack of progress until you are passed the end of you patience. Good friendships can suffer, hire someone else.

Second, always have your design and supplies ready to go. motorman and motorwife, mostly motorwife, spent more than the first two weeks of the project (during demolition) picking tile, fixtures, colors, etc. It was through this activity that I started to understand why the world has interior designers. This activity is not for the squeamish. It is full time everyday where you must look through millions of combinations of colors, textures and styles.

When you finally come to the decision on materials, these will be, no matter what, the materials that take the longest time to order. When we ordered the toilet it was “Oh you want the off-white, well I can get the white in 15 minutes, but the off white requires a bit more time.” We say, “really how long?” They say, “well first the manufacturer has to travel to southern Taiwan an visit the great off-white sand mines, battle the great kiln serpent to gain access to the holy fire, set the sacred porcelain at the temple of water-closets, then they can ship it. Say 4 to 6 weeks.” But “4 to 6 weeks” in supplier language translates into English as “at least 8 weeks, if you push us every single day until we finally break down and call to check on it from the distributor.”

And remember, motorwife did most of the work. I would be in an institution if it were not for that. Thanks dear.

Finally, never and I mean never remodel you one-and-only bathroom in the winter. I am not going to elaborate on this one, because it is so obvious. Plus you can imagine just how pleasant this can be. Thanks health club for all the memories.